


Q has Custody now

by orphan_account



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Chaos, Children, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Rating May Change, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:35:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26202004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Q just wants some family fun. Picard does not.Unfortunately, Picard doesn't get much of a say in what his god powered boyfriend does with the crew.Picard wakes up to nobody answering the comms. Things get better and worse simultaneously.(Q turns the crew into kids. Things go as you'd expect.)
Relationships: Data/Geordi La Forge, Jean-Luc Picard/Q
Comments: 5
Kudos: 55





	1. Q likes Kids

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't edit this yet because I wanted to get it out there! If you see any spelling mistakes or things like that tell me! 
> 
> \- eln0r

Picard woke up, sighing.

He was having a nice dream about grape-vines. Starfleet does not wait for dreams about wine or grapes.

As he put on his uniform, he recalled yesterday.

~

_"Well I'm sorry you can't see the finer things in life, Jean-Luc!"_

_"Q, It doesn't matter how much you yell at me. I am not adopting children. There is no place for children on the enterprise."_

_"But there ARE children here Jean-Luc Picard! You can't deny that!"_

_Picard sighed. Having arguements with Q was an experience._

_"Q, I don't think either of us could raise a child. Can't you see some reason? I don't like children. I live on the flagship of the federation. It would be far too dangerous."_

_"But-"_

_"Q we are not getting any kids."_

_"Alright fine then! I'll show you!"_

_"That you can be a good parent? Really?"_

_Q just pouted and disappeared._

~

Picard reached for his comm badge. Knowing Q, he'd set up some sort of game that ended with him having a child.

Picard disliked children. They didn't belong on the enterprise. It was far too dangerous. He lost enough actual officers and innocent civilians and didn't need any children to add to that.

It didn't help that Riker wasn't answering his comm.

It was probably an engineering related incident. La Forge would know about it.

Geordi La Forge wasn't answering either.

He tried Data, Troi, and Worf. Nobody answered.

Was he dreaming? No.

Was this the work of some alien race? Maybe.

Was this Q? Most likely, yes.

"Q?" He asked into his empty quarters. No answer. Had he actually been expecting one?

Maybe the sensors could show something. If Q had done something with his crew, they probably wouldn't be there anymore.

He jumped when his door rung. Somebody (Hopefully not Q) was there.

"Come in."

He wasn't expecting Geordi to come into his quarters.

He _definately_ wasn't expecting him to be less than 4 feet tall.


	2. Geordi is a kid now whoops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gotta add the children to the children fanfiction ya know? Also Picard is in for a nightmare of epic proportions.

Well, Q had definately done something. Something that turned his chief engineer into a child.

Or maybe this was a bad dream? Maybe he would wake up to a completely normal enterprise with minimal children?

Nope. The child LaForge was still here.

"Hey captain," The chi- _Geordi_ said, "We seem to have encountered a... problem. Do you know anything about the whereabouts of my entire engineering team and my age?"

What was Picard supposed to say? That his god boyfriend had a fight with him and now the crew is made of children? That engineering us gone because Picard likes his job and dislikes kids?

Well Geordi-but-shorter-and-a-child was a problem.

Also the entire crew disappearing or turning into children was a problem.

"Do you know if any other... members of the crew are still on the ship?" 

Smaller Geordi sighed.

"I found Data, but I lost him again."

Of course Geordi would look for Data first. They were dating. They had a great relationship, unlike a certain somebody and a sassy omnipotent being.

"Well, have you tried your comm badge? Communicating with other ships in the area?"

"Yes. It _didn't work_." This child Geordi was more sassy. Children are like that. Picard does not like children.

This was going to be a problem, he could tell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Child Geordi makes an appearance! I have plans for the next chapters of this mess, don't worry.  
> Tell me my grammatical mistakes or other problems, I'm a terrible proofreader :)

**Author's Note:**

> i may or may not have googled how tall a 6 year old is...


End file.
